“Steenhive Sangs An Rhymes”
In May 2026, Pauline visited Primaries 4, 5 and 6 pupils at Arduthie Primary School in Stonehaven to have some fun with Doric vocabulary, songs and rhymes! The visit was part of the school’s Hoolie in the Schoolie – where the pupils were visited by local artists, musicians, dancers and many others.
After a week of workshops, the P4-6 performed their songs at a concert. They were joined by P1 – 3 who had spent the week learning a Scots song to sing together.
Pauline’s workshops followed on from similar work by Ceilidhmakkers Ewan McVicar and Christine Kydd in 2013, where they created songs with Arduthie, Dunnottar and Mill O Forest primary schools.
The ”Steenhive Sangs An Rhymes” workshops were funded by Hands Up For Trad’s Wee Grants programme. Thanks to them for funding this and for Ewan for making the Steenhive Sangs and Rhymes and for help with the project proposal!
FIRST AFF – THE SANGS!
Use these links tae skite doon tae yer song. Rhymes are at the bottom of the page.
- 3/4M – THE TOLBOOTH SONG
- P4MN – SCULPTURES DOON BY THE SHORE
- P5BB – THE WORLD PAPER ‘N’ COMB CHAMPIONSHIP SONG!
- P5M – THE FISHWIFE AND THE GHAIST
- P6T – THE PLAGUE STONE SONG
- P6FP – THE STONEHAVEN FOSSIL
Well the bairns did AFFA weel! Below you’ll find a little bit about the subject the pupils wrote about and a little bit about the tune they used. Then of course, the lyrics! Pauline (and some friends!) also had some fun making a video for each one.
The pupils also illustrated their song and the images will be below each song.
3/4M – THE TOLBOOTH SONG
Down by the harbour in Stonehaven you’ll find the Stonehaven Tolbooth Museum – a wonderful treasure trove of local stories and artifacts run by a team of very knowledgeable volunteers! Find out about the museum here – https://www.stonehaventolbooth.co.uk/
The P4s from P3/4M learned all about how the Tolbooth once served as a prison in the 1600s. They discovered the types of crimes committed, the punishments handed out, and just how harsh life in the gaol could be!
The pupils were inspired by photographs of an old prison door from the cells at the nearby Sheriff Court, dating from 1767.
One prisoner had scratched his name and sentence into the wood each time he was imprisoned there — quite the rogue! They also saw photographs of the museum’s “crank” and the old Bervie stocks. Interestingly, the stocks have seven holes! Can you think why?
(They date from around the Napoleonic Wars, when injured soldiers sometimes returned missing a leg and were forced to beg to survive.)
The pupils wrote the song to the tune of Twa Recruitin Sergeants – quite fitting, as it’s a Napoleonic song!
The Tolbooth
Lang, lang ago if ye brak the law
Meybe the Sherrif wid lock ye awa
Or a day in the stocks an tha’s nivver guid
Fur they’d clart ye wi tattie peelins an ither foosty food
Chorus
An its intae the Tolbooth for aa o yer crimes
An here is a lesson for aa loons an quines
Dinna thieve, dinna beg an kill naebdy ava
Or they’ll lock ye in the Tolbooth an they’ll throw the key awa!
Inside the Tolbooth, life isnae fun
Straa fur a bed on the hard steen grun
Rottans in yer bed, it’s ower-rin wi mice
An ye’ve bites fae the flechs and yer simmit’s fu o lice!
Chorus
Wattery skilly an a hard lump o breid
Ony mair o this food an ye’ll end up deid!
An if that’s nae bad eneuch, ye winna believe the smell
Wid ye raither be in the Tolbooth or wid ye raither be in Hell?
Chorus
And here’s the video of the song with all the pupils illustrations!
The P4 pupils illustrations of the Tolbooth show rats and fleas and straw beds in the old Tolbooth cells, the 7-holed Bervie stocks and some pretty mean jailers!
P4MN – SCULPTURES DOON BY THE SHORE
One of the favourite features of Stonehaven Bay is the metal sculptures. Andy Scott (he of “Kelpies” fame) designed the dolphin which has stood in the bay since 2004. A seal sculpture closer to Cowie followed.
Only a few years later, wonderful steel sculptures started appearing overnight – fishing boats, a light house, a Viking long boat were soon joined by a sea-plane, a lobster and dancing dolphins! The mysterious appearances of these sculptures led to the creator becoming known locally as “The Stonehaven Banksy.”
The pupils of P4MN wrote their song about these sculptures. It’s to the tune of traditional sea shanty Lowlands Away.
Sculptures Doon By The Shore
If ye ivver gang doon Stoney way
Sculptures, sculptures doon bi the shore
There’s bonnie airt doon by the bay
Sculptures doon bi the shore
Hammerheid shark, lobsters an seals
Sculptures, sculptures doon bi the shore
An wee fash sweem in aneth the keels
Sculptures doon bi the shore
A dug an dolphins, partans too
Sculptures, sculptures doon bi the shore
A bird that his a fash in its mou
Sculptures doon bi the shore
A muckle lighthoose, a ship wi sails
Sculptures, sculptures doon bi the shore
Seaplanes an row boats tell mony tales
Sculptures doon bi the shore
A Viking longboat – they cam tae fight
Sculptures, sculptures doon bi the shore
The sculptor pit them there at night
Sculptures doon bi the shore
Stickman waves aa day lang
Sculptures, sculptures doon bi the shore
There’s even Spongebob singin his song
Sculptures doon bi the shore
P4MN – Illustrations for Sculptures Doon By The Shore
The Dolphin Heart and the Lighthouse were the pupils clear favourites, but many of the other sculptures were represented. See below for photos of the original sculptures.
Here are photos of the Sculptures, taken by Pauline.
P5BB – THE WORLD PAPER ‘N’ COMB CHAMPIONSHIP SONG!
Every year, Stonehaven hosts the “World Paper ‘n’ Comb Championship”! Part of the Stonehaven Folk Festival, it draws participants and audiences from across the globe for an afternoon of music, creativity and a whole lot of fun!
P5BB considered writing about the history of the Championship, what it would be like to enter, or even what it would be like to win… but then they started thinking about the judges and what a tough job they have! Their song was written to the tune of famous bothy ballad, The Barnyards of Delgaty.
Find out more about the Stonehaven Folk Festival here – https://stonehavenfolkfestival.co.uk/
The World Paper ‘n’ Comb Championship Song
Chorus
Ye get yer comb an lavvie paper
Wrap it roon, pit it tae yer moo
Blaw a tune an mak it bonnie
Do do dooo do do do dooooo!
Ae year ah gaed doon tae Stonehaven
Performin at the Folk Festival
Ah hid tae judge the Paper ‘n’ Comb
Fa wid be the best o all?
The first aen up wis ae young lassie
She tootled oot a gey guid tune
A mannie dressed up as a lobster
He wis an affa glaekit loon
Next up wis a group o pupils
They came fae Arduthie School
Their comb an paper sang wis affa
Listening tae them wis really cruel!
At last there cam an auld auld wifie
She hid the hale hall jinin in
I think we’ve found oor Wurld Champion
This aul Grunny his tae win!
P5BB – Illustrations for the World Comb n Paper Championship Song!
Photos include – the performers on stage, the winners, the judges, the granny that won, many lovely drawings of the man dressed up as a lobster!
P5M – THE FISHWIFE AND THE GHAIST
Pauline loves a dig around in old newspaper archives and had been sitting on a wonderful story for some time… Did you know there was a Victorian craze for dressing up as ghosts to scare people?
Here are some stories from notorious rag, The Illustrated Police News, from around the time of our tale… They show what a common phenomenon it was!
Well Steenhive didn’t escape this craze, and there’s the tale of a Stoney fishwife who was having none of it! P5M wrote this song which explains the whole story.
It’s sung to the tune of Come Aa Ye Fisher Lassies also known as The Song of the Fishgutters.
The Fishwife an the Ghaist
There aence wis a loon, that cam fae Stonehaven toon
He thocht he’d dress up as a ghaist an rin aroon an roon
Tae gie fowk a fleg an even mak them swoon
An this is the tale o foo he met his doom!
He pit on his mammy’s sheet an rin oot intae the street
An affa funcy mannie he chunced fur tae meet
The mannie got a fleg, his wee quinie feart tae greet
An the ghostie rin awa sae fast ye kwidnae see his feet!
The fowk o Steenhive they telt tales aboot this ghoul
The claiked doon the hairbour an aa roon the school
“He shuildna be sae cruel, it really isnae cool
Let’s aa ging oot thegither an we’ll catch the mingin fool!”
Ragin toonsfowk went oot, the bogle fur tae find
He saa them in the moonlicht, an scarpered doon a wynd
Bit he didnae see the fishwife, fa sneakit up behind
She grabbit him an skepit him fur bein sae unkind!
He rin intae her hoose an she chased him but an ben
She pu’d aff his sheet an clobbered him, ye ken!
“Ye glaekit nesty rascal, I’ll gralloch ye!” but then
He grat an he grat an said he’d nivver dae’t again!
Noo loons an quines oor story his bin telt
Dinna dress up as a bogle, or ye will get the belt!
An thanks tae yon fishwife, justice it wis dealt
An the moral o the story is “Dinna Be A Melt!”
P5M – Illustrations for “The Fishwife and the Ghost”
The pupils loved the idea of a naughty lad getting dressed up in his mithers sheets and being clobbered by a fishwife!
P6T – THE PLAGUE STONE SONG
From the corner of New Street and Victoria Street, Bogwell Lane winds up to Bervie Braes. At the bottom of the lane you’ll find two grave stones known as the Plague Stones. They commemorate Magnvs Tailiovr, seaman who died “in the time of pest 1608” and of Alexander and William Brokie aged 9 and 12 who died in 1648.
P6T wrote a song about the plague in Stonehaven to the tune of Twa Corbies (a spooky tune!)
The wrote the final verse to reassure listeners that people are much less likely to “died of the pest” these days!
The Plague Stone Song
Doon in Stoney there are twa stanes
That used tae lie ower deid fowks banes
They died fower hunert years ago
An they were burriet 6 fit below
They were burriet 6 fit below
Alexander’s sons took their last breath
The stones they telt us o The Black Death
Fever, sickness in bairns in their prime
Buboes in their oxters the next sign
Aye buboes in their oxters the next sign
Fan fowk fun oot that they were dyin
Their freens an faimiles aa were cryin
Panic spread throughout the toon
A feeling o impending doom
Aye a feeling o impending doom
But ninna panic ma bonnie bairns
These days ye winna come tae hairm
Antibiotics, nae rats an flechs
So we fowk winna fear The Pest
We fowk winna fear The Pest
P6T – Illustrations for “The Plague Stone Song”
The pupils LOVED the idea of Plague Doctors! Pauline was a big fan of the plague victim with the buboes in the oxters – and the variety of rats are wonderful! The drawings of the plague stones themselves were fantastic.
P6FP – THE STONEHAVEN FOSSIL
Did you know there’s a REALLY IMPORTANT fossil from Cowie? It’s called Pneumodesmus newmani and is one of the world’s earliest myriapods and one of the oldest creatures to have lived on land. It lived around 428 million years ago. There are many unpronounceable scientific words we could use to describe this creature, but we are in Scotland… where any teeny tiny creatures are simply known as “beasties”!
P6FP wrote their song to be sung to the tune of The Fisherman’s Lassie.
The Stoney Fossil
In 2004, a bus driver Mike
Wis doon on Cowie shore
Seekin fossils fan he foun’
Somethin nivver seen afore
Chorus
I’m a creepy craawly mony leggit thing
I’m a scamperin skitterin beastie
Ah cam oot o the sea mony years ago
An they caa me Nyoooo… nyoooo moohhhh (sigh) “The Stonehaven Fossil!”
It wis the first o its kind tae waak upon the land
A find hid nivver bin greater
It lived aroon aboot four hundred and twenty eight million years ago an that’s an affa lang time!
A truly adventurous cratur!
Chorus
I’m a creepy craawly mony leggit thing
I’m a scamperin skitterin beastie
Ah cam oot o the sea mony years ago
An they caa me Nyoooo… nyoooo moohhhh (sigh) “The Stonehaven Fossil!”
If this beastie wis tae visit us the day
It’d sunbathe by the outdoor pool
Wi sunglesses an its wee bikini on
This beastie is sae cool
Chorus
I’m a creepy craawly mony leggit thing
I’m a scamperin skitterin beastie
Ah cam oot o the sea mony years ago
An they caa me…
“Come on Arduthie, you can say it!”
Pneumodesmus Newmanii
Hyeuch!
P6FP – Illustrations for Pneumodesmus newmanii – The Stonehaven Fossil
There was no better imagery in this song than the wee beastie crawling out of the sea at Cowie and visiting the outdoor pool – in its bikini! (Extra points for the whole family at the Midnight Swim with the DJ Creepy Crawly!)
Here are some amazing drawings of the wee cratur – including a couple of its bus driver pal!
AN NOO, THE RHYMES!
Primary 4MN decided that they would like to write about animals – in particular, their pets. Well that’s all very well – but not everyone has a pet! And that was the inspiration for this rhyme:
Craiturs
Ma freens hae mony craturs
Dougal’s dug can catch a baa!
Marie’s got fash an a kittlen
Bit I hae nae pets ava
Bit unner the sheddie’s a hurcheon!
In thon pond a puddoch bides!
There’s wyvers, slaters neath a dod o wid
There a forkie tailie hides!
Mah pets arenae funcy
Fur my pets are aa bugs
There’s foggiebummers in the gairden
An there’s wurrums, waasps an slugs!
The P4s from P3/4M had a think about what their rhyme should be about. And decided it should be about… writing a rhyme in Doric.
A Doric Rhyme
Wir bairns fae Arduthie Skweel
Wi arenae glaekit, wi arenae feel
Bit noo wi hae tae mak a rhyme
Foo lang’ve wi got? It’ll tak some time!
Wur deein it aa in Doric? Aaah that’s aisy
Wi ken heaps! Thon’s aisy paisy!
Dug, mappie, pudduck an bubbly jock
Mou, oxters, thrapple, doup an dock!
Slavers, snotters, foosty, boggin
Numpty, clarty, scunner, mingin!
Hing on! Wir poyem is a’riddy deen
An it’s sae guid wi’ll send it tae the Queen!
Primary 5BB wrote a rhyme about what they like to do when they’re not in school – there’s so much to do in Stonehaven!
Oor Life In Stoney
In Stoney wi dae mony hings
Fan we’re nae in the skweel
Playin fitba maks us hungert
Deep fried Mars Bar fur wir meal!
Aifter we’ll gang duncin
Mebee skatin doon the park
Sweemin, gairdnin, fashin
It’s affa trauchlin wark
Wi eat oor huggis – affa fine
A bosie wi ma tyke
We’ll ging tae sleep an in the morn…
Well ging oot on wur bikes!
P5BB illustrated their rhyme:
P5M wanted to write a rhyme about an animal. Pauline and the class talked about local wildlife – of which there is great variety! But soon the conversation turned to one of Stonehaven’s most visible birds – the gulls in the bay!
The Affa Hungert Scurry
“DON’T FEED THE SEAGULLS”Spik thon posters doon the toon
Far’s a scurry tae get his denner!?
It’s getting gey near noon!
Ah’ll awa doon tae the hairbour
See fit food’s aboot
Ah’ll chum up aa thon tourists…
O that ah hae nae doot!
“Fit a bonny scurry!”
As ah dunce upon the sand
Ah’ll get them aa tae loe mi
Syne nab their chips oot o their hauns!!
And here are some illustrations of thon affa hungert scurry!
Primary 6T were fair delighted with all the new words they had learned. So they wrote a rhyme about some Scots and Doric words and what they mean.
Our Favourite Doric Words
Bahoodie, doup an dock – they’re aa wurds fur bum!
Faither is for father, mither is for mum
Gardyloo’s fan Medieval fowk chucked their piddle oot the windae
We hate wakin early with the noisy loons on bin day
Crabbit dugs, sleekit moosies, loupin puddocks, scurries
It fair flegs mi fan those craturs swoop doon tae nick ma curry!
Poems an sangs, rhymes an stories – aa o this wiv heard
An noo ye ken aa aboot oor favrit Doric wurds!
P6FP were telling me all about the things there is to do down at Stonehaven Harbour, so they wrote a rhyme about it!
Stoney Hairbour
Stoney his a hairbour
Far there’s mony hings tae dae
Boogie boards an paddle boards
An pier jumpin in the sea
Crabbin, fashin, sweemin
Plouterin in the watter
Sittin on the hairbour waa
An patter, natter, chatter!
Fan the tide is oot we’ll dig a hole
“A bucket! Gies a shottie!”
We’ll mak a sandcastle braw an big
Hae a cappie fae Giulianotti’s!
And finally … JEANNIE JENKINS!
The P1, 2 and 3 pupils all learned to sing “Jeannie Jenkins” – a song where a lassie asks her mother what she should wear. The P3 pupils from P3/4 M illustrated her best dress!
Thankyou to all the pupils, teachers, funders, Ewan and Christine for working with Pauline on this project!
If you’d like to have a similar Doric song-writing or rhyme-creating project, please get in touch! (See contact/links tab at the top!)
Pauline Cordiner - Scottish Storyteller 